My Walk to Wellness (Part 1)

"In order to change we must be sick and tired of being sick and tired." ~ Author Unknown

For almost two years now, my mobility has been hampered by Ostheo-arthritis. Unfortunately, genetic pre-disposition could be the cause of this early onset as this is a common ailment among the elderly. My doctor said I have the knees of an old woman! Simple activities such as walking, standing, going up and down stairs, getting up from or sitting on a chair require too much effort and take longer than usual. I do not mind so much the length of time involved as much as the pain that I experience every time I move my knees. Even shifting my position while lying down would be very painful and uncomfortable. It's very humbling - I am dependent on my family and other people to assist me with the simplest of things and it frustrates me no end. It's embarrassing - I'm too young to have this condition and people can be rude by staring at me when I walk with an awkward gait or am pushed around in a wheelchair. It's very limiting - I can't go to certain places where there are no facilities for the disabled like wheelchair, elevator, lifter or ramp. It's frustrating - I can't do the things that I love or need to do. Cooking would be torture as I could not last 5 minutes without needing to sit down. I am a trainer and it annoys me to have to lecture sitting down. (I am thankful for the skill to sustain my audience's interest despite this condition!). There's still so much that I want to do but somehow, this ailment would discourage me from pursuing my plans. I've consulted doctors and underwent treatment, to no avail. I've taken all the vitamins that the doctor would say I need and tried to lose weight to somehow ease the pressure on my knees but....I must admit that there were times when I'd cry in desperation and frustration and succumb to spells of self-pity but I would always try to bounce back so as not to fall into the trap of accepting what I thought would be my fate. There are options out there that claim to be able to relieve me of my pain but most entail costs and could have adverse effects. These would make me all the more frustrated. I have entertained the thought of how to adapt to a life in a wheelchair. It would be the easiest, cheapest albeit the most painful (literally and figuratively) option. All this time, I would have my ever-supportive husband Gani encourage me to believe that help is on the way, that God will make a way and that I will get better. Most times I believe him, but there have been times that I felt resigned to the situation that I'm in. I am embarrassed for him as I think he's too young to be saddled with a wife who moves about like a very old woman. The wedding vow - in sickness and in health, could never be more apt as I experience Gani's care and concern. But as in all things, there is an end to everything, including my pain.